Vacationed without You

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Dear Future Husband,

I did a thing that I don’t like to do, which is make vacation plans a year in advance. That’s not really how I flow, because anything can happen between now and a year from now. I’m more of a, decide that I want to go somewhere, decide where that somewhere is, and be on a flight three weeks later, kind of woman. However, this trip sounded like a trip I didn’t want to pass up on, at the time, but five or six weeks before this ‘scheduled a year in advance’ vacation was to take place, I wanted to back out.

There were several reasons why I thought I didn’t want to be there. One, while I am an extrovert, I’m probably one of the most introverted extroverts you’ll ever meet. The thought of spending eight days in a house with a bunch of other people was a bit overwhelming. Also, I was concerned that I wouldn’t be able to spend quiet time in the presence of the Lord. I was a bit anxious about not having the time to myself to fill my spirit with the Word each day. Spending time in His presence is of the utmost importance to me, so the thought of not being able to do that had me a little nervous.

Fast forward to eight days later, my anxiety was unfounded. I had a great time seeing old friends and making new ones. Visited some towns like Nantucket and Edgartown, places not necessarily on my radar of places to go, but were quaint little towns that I’m glad I visited. And while I hung out in Oak Bluffs everyday, I didn’t have a chance to do the Oak Bluffs historical tour, but I’ll do that the next time I’m there. Speaking of which, the next time I go, it would be nice if you’re there with me.

Initially, I thought there might be a chance of us meeting but quickly realized that the Vineyard, at this time of the year, are full of families and couples. There were very few single men on the island, which honestly, I don’t understand. During this time of the year, there are thousands of single women there. If you’re looking for any sort of relationship, from hooking up to marriage, Martha’s Vineyard in August is the place to be.

Anyhoo, you weren’t there and it’s a shame because you totally missed me being attacked by a hangry bird!

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Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com

I was standing on the pier eating a breakfast sandwich, waiting for the ferry to take me to Nantucket, and just as I was about to take a bite of my sandwich, a seagull swooped down, grabbed the sandwich out of my hand, hitting me in the face in the process. LOL. I can laugh now but dude, I was totally shook. I didn’t know what hit me because it all happened so fast! 🤣🤣. And when I looked up, there were four more angry birds ready to attack the part of the sandwich which had fallen to the ground. Maannn, you should have seen the others who were with me trying to put away their food and run away from the area. I don’t think they moved that fast at any other time during the week. LMBO! What memories.

So a good time was had. I’m glad I didn’t back out, and I’m also sorry you missed it. Unless you were there with someone else 🤔. We’ll have to talk about that.

Until we meet,

Your Wife

 

A Whole Year Later

Dear Future Husband,

It’s been a year since I started writing and well, you’re still somewhere trippin’ and not here. I stopped writing you a long time ago because honestly, I kinda stopped thinking about you. I know, I know. You’re probably saying, “Oh, you’re just gonna give up on me like that?” and the answer is yes, yes I am. You’ve had plenty of time and opportunity to show up. Also, it hasn’t hurt that one of my friends, who’s already been married twice and is obsessed with finding a third husband, relocated out of state so is no longer around to constantly bring up the issue of men and marriage. So you just haven’t been my primary focus lately.

Actually, I did attempt to write you back in April. I wanted to talk about love languages. Wondering if you know what yours is and if your primary love language is the same as mine, Acts of Service. What I learned from my last relationship (don’t worry you’ll learn more about that later) is that when you share the same language, loving the other person doesn’t really feel like work at all. It comes naturally because you love the way you want to be loved. But what happens when the love language is different? My guess is that it feels like a stretch assignment for which you weren’t quite ready to perform. Hey, perhaps that’s why we haven’t come into each other’s lives yet. Maybe I’m not ready to do the work required to love someone who doesn’t love like I love, or maybe…you’re not.

Well, until we meet,

Your Girl

 

 

Hope You Like Baguettes and Wine

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Dear Future Husband,

I went into the grocery store to buy food for dinner and came home with a french baguette and a bottle of wine. I had to laugh at myself because I’ve become that girl. The one who no longer cares about preparing a full course meal. Just give me some bread and butter, and a glass of wine, and I’m good.

So future hubs, I hope you too like french baguettes and wine…or take out…or cereal, because I don’t know that I have the energy for full course meals on a regular basis anymore. Now, had you come along 10-15 years ago, or heck, even 5 years ago, preparing meals would’ve been my pleasure, but I think I’ve lost my cooking mojo.

I remember back in the day, I’d cook Sunday dinner on Sunday mornings before church. I was preparing to be your wife and that was a part of my training. My thought was, dinner would be ready anytime we were ready to eat, and we could spend the afternoon watching football without either of us having to be in the kitchen slaving over the stove. Those were the days, but days gone by buddy, because that’s definitely not happening anymore. No sir. Un-less! Unless you’re a multimillionaire and I can be a stay-at-home wife. Then I’ll gladly exchange a dinner of bread and wine for a full course meal. Heck, you might even get dessert too, shoot.

Well, as always

With Love,

From Your Future Wife

Had To Check Myself

Dear Future Husband,

This morning I had to repent, not for wanting what I want, but for thinking I have the right to demand my own way. For being frustrated and angry that I can’t have what I want when I want it, which is you, right now. This morning, I had to ask myself, who am I that I should go before God and demand anything? It was such a display of little faith, that I needed to check myself.

See, because of the relationship I have with the Father, I know that He will not withhold any good thing from me. He promised me that, and He’s a God who keeps His promises. So really, why am I trippin’? When you become that good thing, we will be together, of this I’m sure.

Love,

Your Future Wife

Waiting with Tears

Dear Future Husband,

This morning was difficult. I had to pray through some serious tears. Tears of sadness because I’m tired of being told to wait. Don’t settle. One day God is going to show you why it didn’t work out with anyone else. Blah, blah, blah. Not to put any pressure on you, but all I know is, you better be worth it. Worth every tear, all the loneliness, all the aloneness.

Love,

Your Future Wife

 

I Joined A Dating Site

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Dear Future Husband,

I joined a dating site. And not just any dating site, but apparently the one that’s known for people just “hooking up.” Honestly, I don’t know why I did it, except it was an early Saturday morning and something I’d just read, while scrolling through my TL, caught my attention, and before I know it I was headed to the site. Why I didn’t stop there? Curiosity. I wanted to see what the site had to offer, even though I knew, down in my spirit, it wasn’t the place I’d meet you.

There was this one guy. He was tall, dark and kinda-handsome. He was the only guy I actually exchanged numbers with, and talked to, because apparently, people match and then don’t actually talk to each other. It’s a very strange site. But anyway, he only wanted to talk about sex and I knew right away this wasn’t the site for me. And just so you know, I don’t mind talking about sex, but that’s not all I want to discuss, and it certainly isn’t the FIRST thing I want to discuss. I mean, the first question after we exchanged pleasantries was, “do you masturbate, and did you masturbate this morning?” Whoa whoa whoa. “Dude, you don’t qualify to ask or receive an answer to that question,” was my response. Needless to say, that was my first and last conversation with him.

It was actually the last conversation with anyone, as that one month of membership I paid for was a waste of money, and I’ve since deleted the account. You can reimburse me when we meet, by the way 😉. So I pray you’re not looking for me there because if you are, you won’t find me. You have a much better chance of meeting me on Twitter, IG or LinkedIn, where it’s free, and you can light weight get to know how I think and the things I’m interested in.

Well, until the next time. I’ll holla.

Love,

Your Future Wife

Wasn’t Thinking About You

Dear Future Husband,

For maybe two or three weeks I didn’t think about you much. I was busy working on some things that had me pretty occupied, like the second edition of my book. But then a friend came into town for work, and stayed over the weekend so we could hangout. We spent a day and a half laughing, analyzing his current relationship, and having deep philosophical conversations about nothing, but everything at the same time. Unfortunately, when he left, so did the peace I had prior to his coming.

Well it’s been four weeks since then, and I’ve since gotten my mind right. Though I won’t lie, the fact that men have been coming out of the woodwork lately has certainly helped. And while it has all been very entertaining I know that none of them are you. But because it has been entertaining, I’ve not been whining to the Father about when you’re going to show up. Actually I’ve spent time praying for you. You know, prayers like, Father, break up the relationship he’s currently in. Make him miserable until he does. LOL. Okay, maybe the prayer hasn’t been that crass, but I have been praying for you. I hope you’re well.

Until next time.

Love,

Your Future Wife

The Mouse Is Dead

Dear Future Husband,

Oh. My. God! There was a mouse in the house! But I didn’t panic. I didn’t pack up my things and abandon the place. I did the very grown up, brave thing to do, and patched the hole in the wall, where I think the mouse came in, and I bought mouse traps….20 of them to be exact. Okay, maybe I went a bit overboard, but I was determined to catch a mouse!

The guy at Ace Hardware showed me exactly how to set up and bait the traps, which I did with great precision. The peanut butter applied to each trap was enough to tempt any mouse, but especially one who hadn’t eaten in days. Um, yeah. it came to the wrong place looking for food. So at this point it was either going to be caught in the trap or it was going to starve to death. But I needed it to die in the corner, in a trap, and not wake up to a dead mouse in the middle of my floor! Do you know how horrified I would’ve been?!

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Hooray for a multitude of well baited mouse traps! This morning the mouse was dead. And not only was it dead, but the force of the trap caused the trap to flip over and was on top of the mouse. That was God’s grace by the way, because He knew I couldn’t stomach seeing the nasty thing lying there dead on my floor.

I know you’re probably thinking, “Yes! I knew my brave girl could do it,” but really, this is where I freak out. Yeah, I know I talked about being brave…that was yesterday. Today is a new day and all bravery is gone. Anxiety kicked in and all I could think about was how was I going to get rid of this dead mouse? After showering and getting dressed I left the house, because I needed time to think this through. You know, kinda like turning down the radio in the car so you can find the address you’re looking for. Should I ask a stranger walking down the street to come in and sweep it up for me? But then I thought I better not do that because he might come back later and kill me. Next thought was, is there a handyman service I can call, who specifically pick up dead mice for single women? Hey, that’s not a bad idea, you just have to charge enough so it’s worth the gas you’ll use getting to the next customer. Anyway, I digress. What was I going to do? Think Robin, think. Call the ex and ask him to get off the train, come sweep up the mouse, and then get back on the train to get to work? No, that wasn’t going to work. What to do? I eventually reached out to a friend and asked him if he’d come help me. And, like good friends do, he got out of bed and drove 20 minutes away to come sweep up the mouse. Thank God for friends!

Now the mouse is dead and gone and I can get back to mourning the lost of my great aunt. I pray to God, if there is a next time, you’ll be here to handle it because I’m not built for this, and I don’t know how many more times I can call a friend.

I Didn’t Fit In

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Dear Future Husband,

What a busy weekend it’s been. It’s now late Sunday night and I’ve just come in from an all-white day party in the city, thrown by one of the local chapters of my sorority. There were about 500 people in attendance, 400 of us were women. The music was great as were the hors D’oeuvres. I danced by myself, while eating a slice of pizza.

I hoped to meet you there. I hoped that you’d look past the other 399 beautiful women and see me from across the patio. Then you’d make your way over to me and say, “you don’t look like you’re having much fun.” And I’d respond with some witty retort, which you’d think was funny. We’d spend the next fifteen minutes talking, before being pulled away by a buddy of yours, but not before asking for my number. I know this all sounds dreamy, and honestly, though I hoped for it, I knew before I ever made it to the event that it wouldn’t happen. Not because I don’t think it could’ve, because I believe all things are possible. I just knew that it wouldn’t, and had resigned myself to enjoying the event without you.

Well, after two hours of standing and watching the crowds take pics, dance, buy drinks and stand around in huddles talking and laughing, the Holy Spirit said, “You don’t fit in here,” and it was at that point I decided I should leave. Though I love being on the Chicago River on a beautiful Summer evening, He was of course right. I don’t, for many different reasons, fit in with that crowd, so I quietly left the party and made my way home.

Welp, future husb, it’s late and I’m sleepy. so I’ll write you later. Good night.

 

I Turned 50 Yesterday

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Friends celebrating birthday

Dear Future Husband,

My 50th birthday was on Sunday. Dude, where in the world were you? Trying to get a flight here? Occupied with someone else? Knocked out after Sunday service? I mean, really, where were you?

Instead of spending my birthday on somebody’s island, eating good food and having sex on the beach – yes, both the drink and hot sandy forbidden sex – I decided to invite a bunch of friends to come celebrate with me. We had a great time playing the escape game, and having dinner and drinks afterward. You would’ve enjoyed the game, even though you may have called the idea corny at first. You missed out this time, but hopefully you’ll be around next year.